One of the things I’ve always wanted to experience more of is different types of cuisine. I always pictured myself doing so with others, whether that be with friends, family, or with a partner. Something appeals to me about being able to say, “Oh yeah, the first time I tried X type of food was with you! What a good memory” blah blah blah.
I recently had a court hearing for the custody case I am in with Dmitry over Luna. I’ll go into more detail about the case once it’s over, but the general gist of it is that there have been instances of domestic violence. When I learned of it, I became wary, and as time went on, things worsened.
So I rehired my attorney and filed a petition to modify the existing custody order. We had the hearing for temporary orders recently. There is a shortage of judges at the court because jury trials have started again after COVID, and the judges are all tied up in the backlog of cases that are suddenly back on the calendar.
As a result, we had to wait all morning for the first part of the case (Dmitry was attempting to declare “not ready” a second time to try to push the hearing back a second time. That had to be heard first before we could proceed.)
We were finally called about 11 or 11:30. I’d had some early morning meetings (6:30 and 7 AM) before leaving at 8 to make it to the courthouse on time. I did not have time to grab any breakfast or even water. So by the time we were called up to speak to the judge, I was dehydrated and dizzy. I had to concentrate on standing without swaying while the judge heard the matter for 5 minutes.
When the court went on recess at 12:00 noon, I knew I had to go get something to eat and drink, stat. I am unfamiliar with the area, so i just walked outside the courthouse and took a look around.
I saw a Mexican restaurant, a Chinese restaurant, and an Indian restaurant across the street. I immediately dismissed the Indian restaurant because I haven’t ever had Indian food before.
But then I realized
I didn’t want Mexican or Chinese food.
I wanted to try Indian food.
I had dismissed it out of habit. Because I had never tried it before, and I was holding off until there was an opportunity to try it with someone.
But what I am realizing more and more is that there are many things I will never experience if I wait to experience them with someone else.
The ones with whom I experience things are cherished, as are the memories I create with them. But the one whom I experience everything with is myself. And if I am unwilling to simply be, alone or otherwise, then I can’t truly be an individual.
I would always be a sum of experiences I associate with someone else. Never just me and my experiences, but me and my experiences in relation to someone else.
I don’t want that for myself.
So I made a decision. I walked to The Indian Night, a quiet, clean restaurant with an atmosphere of comfort and class.
I liked it immediately.
The kind host led me to a small table and brought me some much-needed ice water.
I ordered samosas as an appetizer and something called lamb biryani.
As I sat there, alone, I pulled out my notebook from my briefcase. I jotted down some notes on how I was feeling, knowing I’d want to look back on it.
I thought I’d feel sad. I don’t. As much as I like the idea of sharing the experience with someone, I also like that I get to try this new thing on my own, form my own opinion without anyone else’s overshadowing mine.
I recognize that I’ve had a tendency to defer to others’ thoughts and opinions, remaining neutral or agreeing simply to avoid conflict. Over the last year, I have practiced being more direct (without apologizing or back tracking).
I have to have an opinion before I can communicate it though. And this gave me the perfect opportunity to form my own opinion on Indian food. Or at least these particular dishes at this particular restaurant.
It was far too much food for me to eat in one sitting (of course, I eat like a bird). Nevertheless, I ate as much as I could because it was delicious. I felt like I’d just had a 10 course feast by the time I’d finally put the fork down.
The samosas were delightful, crunchy on the outside with delicious vegetables on the inside. They were cooked to perfection, and I enjoyed the whole peas. There was a spicy sauce they provided, and I tried it with that as well. It was even better with the sauce.
The lamb biriyani was very different from any rice dish I’d ever had. I have no idea how it was seasoned, but it was very fragrant and flavorful. The chunks of lamb were very well seasoned and tender. The way there were chunks of meat reminded me of rice and gravy, a popular dish in Louisiana. However, the rice was dry, no gravy.
There were these crunchy bits, some of which looked kind of like sunflower seeds, others which looked like dried fruit of some kind. I couldn’t identify them, but they seemed to be the source of the fragrant quality and had potent flavor.
As a matter of fact, I have no idea if you’re supposed to eat them.
But I did. And I enjoyed them.
And I’m still alive and well.
So I would say who the hell cares if you’re “supposed to” or not? I ate them, and I liked them. They added a uniqueness to the dish, as well as the intense flavor that I so enjoyed.
I wouldn’t say that Indian food can be crossed off my list since I’ve only tried a couple of Indian dishes at this point. But I can now say that I have tried it and want to have more.
And whether with someone or alone, I fully intend to.
**READ ME (please)**
Two things!
One, please note that the names of everyone in this blog have been altered to protect the people I write about. My main goal is to explore my experiences and my growth, not air anyone’s dirty laundry out. Any likeness to people you know in real life are probably coincidental. (I mean what are the chances? It’s a pretty big world!)
Two, the thoughts and opinions I express in this blog are merely a result of my personal experiences to this point in my life. If there is anything I have misrepresented, overlooked, or have a blind spot for, feel free to leave a comment or email me at contact@livingbetween.net. (Yes, this includes typos. Let me fix my typos, please!) All I ask is that you always remain respectful.
Talk soon!
– Lynda –
Living Between 