Calming, Crystal-Clear Clarity

I mentioned last week that I spent some time admiring my latest crystal haul while I waited for Luna and Zeph to come home, and I mentioned that I would talk more about that this week?

Well now it’s this week, and it’s time to explain all of that!

Do you remember how the whole reason why I started all of this was because I didn’t know who was looking back at me when I looked in the mirror? I was so busy surviving my marriage that I lost almost all of who I was along the way. So I needed a way to get to know myself again, to have light conversations, deep conversations, intellectual conversations, and reflect on all of my experiences so I could find out who Lynda is again.

Just like you would do when you really want to get to know someone.

Well, along this new path, over the last year and a half, I explored a new avenue of introspection and spirituality for myself that I have felt very connected to. I have felt a little silly about it and haven’t discussed it much with many people and I’ve been a little scare to share it here, to be quite honest with you. I think that’s because in a way, when I put my thoughts out like this, even if I don’t believe anyone will ever read it, it still makes it very tangible in a way that makes me feel very exposed and vulnerable.

Which is hard to overcome when I already feel silly as it is.

But I’m ready now. Ready to let this part of me be fully integrated, fully me in all my messy, fiery glory. And this is the first step.

I reject organized religion, and I don’t adhere to any of them. I haven’t since I was a teenager. As an intellectual, I have a hard time accepting anything that seems mystical, unexplainable, or anything outside of what I am able to perceive.

That’s not to say I am a faithless person. I have faith in a lot of things. I have faith in physics, that they will remain intact while I fly a plane or drive a car. I have faith in normal force, that it will stay in force while I’m sitting in my chair. I have faith in the instruments I use to make observations about the world around me, everything from rulers and scales to electron microscopes and spectrophotometers. Just like anyone who relies on data, I have a good faith assumption that the data that is observed is correct, and I draw conclusions from that data.

But when there is no observable data, when it comes to intuition, emotions, and gut feelings, I have a lot more trouble integrating that into my belief system.

I think a lot of people can relate.

Back when I was in the thick of my marriage, I had no religion, and I was searching for wisdom that would help me as I tried to navigate the maelstrom I called marriage. I found a few teachings that really resonated with me — Toltec wisdom, Buddhist teachings, and Universal metaphysics. In this instance, Universal is in reference to the Universe itself.

I found myself drawn to the simple and beautiful way that humans and their emotions are described by the Toltec. They have eloquent analogies that put things into a whole new perspective, and I find that their teachings are incredibly helpful with understanding myself as I relate to other people and the natural world around me.

The harmony of Buddhist teachings are aligned with those of the Toltec. They also share deep and ancient wisdom about the connection we all share to the earth, animals, the plants, and to other humans. The peace and serenity that I find when incorporating Buddhist wisdom into my daily life has been enlightening because I think and feel so much more clearly when I am at peace. And calming the storm is easier than before.

Don’t get me wrong, the storm is always simmering, and it can flare up. No one get the idea that I’m always at peace. I am a work in progress, and I will never say that I’m not.

At the same time, I know where I’ve been. I know that there was a period of time when the storm was an endless torrent of rain being whipped around in winds with the speed of a tornado, and anyone who had the misfortune of being near the storm would be hurt indiscriminately, whether they were the ones who had hurt me or who were trying to help me.

I’ve come a long way.

And both the teachings of Toltec and Buddhist sages have helped tame that storm into the simmer that it is now.

I also found Universal metaphysics, or in other words, spiritual principles of the Universe. There is a TON of thought, opinion, interpretation, and practice related to metaphysics, and I have studied it since I learned of it 6 years ago. The thing I like most about Universal metaphysics is that you have the complete freedom and autonomy to take what resonates with you and leave the rest.

There is no one bludgeoning you over the head with a book saying you HAVE to believe what they do or else you’ll be eternally punished in one nightmarish way or another. There is also no one bribing you with virgins, crowns, or roads paved with gold.

Instead, there is an invitation to explore openly, to exist freely, to discover endlessly, to love and be loved unconditionally, and above all else, to learn who you were always meant to be.

At least that’s what I get out of it, and that’s what I share when I share about my spirituality. Which I only have done for a very select few people. This has been a deeply personal journey for me so far, and I haven’t shared it except with a trusted few.

So how does this all tie into my crystal haul last weekend?

Part of what has really resonated with me with metaphysics was the use of crystals in my spiritual journey. There were a few reasons why this resonates.

1. Crystals are a direct connection to the Earth. They come directly out of the Earth, sometimes deep down, and I can hold a piece of her directly in my hands. That connection is beautiful to me and helps me feel grounded.
2. I know from an intellectual perspective that each and every stone has its own vibration. This is a fact of quantum physics and inorganic chemistry. The molecular structure of each crystal is unique to itself, and the combinations and ratios of each mineral together make each crystal unique.
3. Each stone has its own personality, and the more time you spend with them, the more you can see more of it. The crevices, the turns, the spots, the hidden bits that you didn’t see the first time. It’s like getting to know someone — you have to spend more time with them if you want to see all the stuff you didn’t see at first.
4. I find that crystals are an excellent conduit for focus. Whether I want to focus on unblocking a specific chakra center, focus on my work, invite in more peace and joy, or deepen my spiritual connection to the Universe, there is a crystal that can help me focus my energy so I can do what I’ve set out to do.
5. They lift my spirits just in their beauty alone. Each and every one is so unique, and when I select the ones that I bring into my life, there is a connection, a calling of sorts. They call out to me, and I respond to this tug, bringing them home.

And so last weekend, I had received a parcel with the latest group that had called to me, and I was admiring them and welcoming them home. Of course, then I cleanse them and find a place for them, either on a shelf, in a special box, or near my on my night stand or desk. Sometimes I have to sit with them to find out where they will be the most comfortable and resonate the most.

I started using them in card readings about 2 years ago, and the way I do it now is that before I even start the reading, I select one that is calling to me and arrange them on a wood (protection and energy purification) or crystal slab, sometimes ruby zoisite (psychic enhancement, spiritual growth, and emotional healing) and sometimes fossilized blue coral (ancient wisdom, intuition, calm, and throat/third eye chakras). Then I select the cards that jump out at me (literally) to give me a message from the universe. The first one that jumps goes under the first crystal, and so on until I have all three laid out. The meaning of the crystal combined with the meaning of the card are the full message that I receive during these readings.

It’s pretty rare for me not to use them during card readings.

I also use them for everyday things. I carry one with me at almost all times, and I have them near me in all the places I spend the most time around the house. My desk, on my nightstand, on my dresser, on my altar. Luna has crystals in her room, and Zeph has some on his desk and in the living room. We have crystals all over the house, and it helps me feel connected all throughout the day.

These and all the other ways I use crystals (meditation, cleansing, creating, and so on) have led me to acquire many crystals. And as I have acquired more, I have learned something else about them.

Sometimes, a crystal will call out to me to bring it home. But not because I am the one it needs to be with. Sometimes, it comes to me as simply the next step on its journey. I have become the conduit for people in my life to receive what the Universe wants them to receive.

I’ve been learning to trust that more and more.

While I was still married, I couldn’t explore my spirituality hardly at all. Donna insisted that I would be inviting demonic forces into our home (that’s not an exaggeration). She would ridicule me and diminish what I was learning and incorporating into my daily routines and practices. I think that’s probably why there is still mental blockage on my part about expressing my beliefs and sharing what has become such an integral part of my life and gets stronger and stronger every day.

But I’ve been working through it, and over the last year, I’ve become more open with my beliefs and with sharing my knowledge and intuition. The wisdom I receive isn’t only for me to hold in my mind and in my heart, but rather to share with those who are seeking the same wisdom I once did.

So while I’ve learned how to use crystals to deepen my spiritual practices, I’ve learned to pass along the crystals that I once thought were for me and even helping guide those around me who are also open to the wisdom the Universe has to offer. I’ve help set up close friends with groupings of crystals that provided them exactly the energies they needed in their lives. It’s been a rewarding new level of spiritual attunement that I didn’t know existed, and I love it a lot.

In fact, I’m thinking of making it something that I offer to more people, to open myself up to spreading this knowledge and allowing myself to be a conduit for the Universe to communicate and provide its guidance to others.

But who knows! All I know right now is that I am finally ready to be more open about what I believe, what aligns with me, without worrying about what others will say. If they will scoff, if they will scorn me, or try to tell me I’m wrong, it doesn’t matter. No one can take this from me.

No one.